![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
beren_writesSorry about the delay the Silent Solidarity Project took rather more time than expected and then this fic decided it wanted a whole new chapter ... again! :)
And I forgot to add ... definitely more than boy kissing in this one.
Title: Out With the Old, In With the New 10/20
Author: Beren
Fandom: Tokio Hotel RPS
Pairing(s): Bill/Tom, Bill/OMC (reported, non-con)
Rating: NC17/18
Warnings: rape (non-graphic), twincest, vampires
Summary: There are things that many people do not see and are never supposed to see, but when one of these takes Bill from his hotel room, by force, everything changes for him and Tom.
Links:
Prologue | Ch 01 | Ch 02 | Ch 03 | Ch 04
| Ch 05 | Ch 06 | Ch 07 | Ch 08 | Ch 09
| Ch 10 | Ch 11 | Ch 12 | Ch 13 | Ch 14
| Ch 15 | Ch 16 | Ch 17 | Ch 18 | Ch 19 | Ch 20
Full Chapter Listing (with chapter descriptions)
Chapter 10 Getting Ready
The next day they were off to the apartment and they had spent most of the day packing and making sure everything was ready. Tom could tell that Bill was incredibly nervous about the whole thing, but was putting a brave face on it. Leaving the comfort and safety of home was a big step and he wouldn't have let it happen if he hadn't thought Bill could cope.
One of the consequences of the move was that that evening it was the last night visit from Syb. In the apartment with the other guys it would be impossible to have the long, often intimate chats with Bill's mentor and sometimes Markus. Bill was in no way ready to let go of Syb's guidance yet, but any meetings were going to have to be arranged more formally from now on. They wouldn't be able to act so casually around each other either. Tom knew it was going to be difficult not being able to just reach out and touch Bill anyway he wanted at anytime.
Tom had already had a quiet word with Georg and Gustav to explain that he and Bill would probably disappear into one of their rooms at odd times. He had told his friends it was because Bill sometimes needed personal space without anyone else but him around and they had been very understanding of the whole idea. Once a bedroom door was shut, he was confident that it would be sacrosanct, but they couldn't hide out the whole time.
"Syb's here," Bill said as they arranged the living room ready for the meeting.
Bill was becoming extremely proficient with the enhanced senses gig and Tom was very glad of this, because it had saved them a couple of times. Even though their mother and step father accepted their new relationship, being caught snogging would have been mortifying.
"I'll get the door, you get the drinks and let Mum and Gordon know that our guests have arrived," Tom said and headed in the right direction.
Syb had been giving Bill and him lots of information about Strigoi society and the traditions and niceties of it. This being the last chance they had to see Syb and Marcus at home, Bill had decided, as Bill was want to do, that this should be a special occasion. It turned out that the whole wine and blood thing was a tradition at more than just formal gatherings and, between close friends, the blood was often the host's. Tom didn't think Bill was overly fond of red wine, but Bill was embracing the tradition and had even begged Gordon to find some wine glasses with gold stems and some others with silver stems. Everything was set up in the kitchen and although Tom had put his foot down at drinking wine, he was happy to see Bill partially back on form.
Their mother had been most surprised when they had invited her and Gordon to the gathering; usually their parents made themselves scarce when Syb was coming round, to give them some privacy. It wasn't a huge house so most often their parents went out on those evenings.
"Come in," Tom greeted brightly as he opened the door.
Syb smiled at him, since she had not yet knocked.
"Not you too," Markus complained in a good natured tone. "We, as the humans, have to help them," Markus nodded in Syb's direction, "to maintain the illusion of not being omnipotent; otherwise it goes to their heads."
Tom laughed and moved out of the way, so their guests could enter the house.
"Blame Bill," he said as he took Syb and Markus' coats, "and blame Bill for this evening as well; he wanted to make it special."
After hanging up the coats on two available hooks, he led his friends into the living room and watched Syb take in the area. The whole place was lit by candles, far gentler on vampire eyes than any electric light and there were little bowls of nibbles on various small tables around the room. Bill appeared seconds later carrying a tray and looking kind of nervous, but to Tom's delight Syb saw the wine glasses on the tray and absolutely beamed. It wasn't very often that Syb seemed to let such an all encompassing expression onto her face, so Tom was positive the female Strigoi was incredibly pleased.
Obviously encouraged, Bill walked over to their guests with the tray and offered first Syb and then Markus a glass.
"This is a wonderful surprise," Syb said, taking a sip from her glass.
For a split second Syb looked rather startled and Tom was sure he saw the woman's eyes flash just for a moment.
"Are you okay?" Bill asked, clearly having seen the same thing and putting the try down. "Did I do it wrong?"
Tom could feel the evening going downhill rapidly before it had really begun, but Syb reached out quickly and patted Bill gently on the hand.
"You did it perfectly," Syb said with a smile and visibly recovering, "it's just your blood is distinctly potent."
"What Syb means is that she has no head for the strong stuff," Markus added with a laugh, at which Syb just rolled her eyes.
It was then that Tom saw his mother and step father arrive and he casually walked over to where Bill had put down the drinks and handed them out. He took a glass himself to keep Bill happy, but he had an eye on the exit to the kitchen where he had some cold beer in the fridge. Then he stepped up close to Bill, because he knew his twin was not quite finished.
"I just wanted to say thank you," Bill said, uncharacteristically bashful. "It's been a difficult time these last few weeks and I know I wouldn't be standing here ready to step back into the world without all of you. I know it's not over and there's still a long way to go, but I wanted to say thank you now, before it gets crazy."
Putting his glass down Bill bent down behind the table and produced a few little boxes. The agonising that had gone into deciding what was in each had been, in Tom's opinion, way over the top, but when Bill did something it was never done by halves.
"They're not much, but I hope you like them," Bill said, and quickly handed a box to Syb, then Markus and then each of their parents.
What surprised Tom was when he was handed one as well. He had helped Bill plan and order everything, paying extortionate prices so that everything was ready on time, but he had not helped Bill buy something for him. How Bill had managed to do so without him knowing was beyond him; they had hardly ever been apart.
"Mum helped," Bill said with a sheepish smile.
Tom found himself grinning happily. They rarely bought each other presents. They bought each other things all the time, like if he saw something in a shop he just knew Bill would love and if Bill had known about it wouldn't have been able to live without, he'd pick it up and vice versa, but actual, wrapped gifts were rare and hence very special.
Opening his box, he couldn't help laughing in delight; it was a hat, not a cap, but one of the bands he wore under his caps to keep his dreads back. It was black, just like his others, but he knew Bill and he knew that wouldn't be it so he pulled it out of the box. Sure enough, on the inside there was some embroidery and it said: "All my love, Bill".
"Thank you," was all he said and pulled Bill towards him, giving his twin a quick kiss on the lips.
Bill was smiling when they pulled apart, but still looked nervous.
"Oh, Bill," Tom heard their mother say and he turned to see her holding the two tickets he had helped Bill put in a box earlier.
Their mother loved the theatre, but because of the crazy lives they all had and where they lived, she very rarely had a chance to go. Bill had found her favourite play, bought the best tickets in the house and arranged hotel accommodation and transport to go with it.
"You always say it's your favourite," Bill said, smiling a bit more, "I hope it's a good company."
"Sweetheart," their mum said, looking just this side of weepy, "they could be the local players and it would still be wonderful."
It seemed as if everyone was taking turns, because Gordon opened his next. They had been buying people expensive presents since they had had the money to do it, they liked to make their friends and family happy, so it had been very difficult for Bill to decide what to buy their parents. Tom had had a lot to do with this one and he was very proud of Bill for thinking of it. Their stepfather was frowning as he pulled a piece of paper out of the box and Tom knew all it said on the top was Gibson.
He was not the only Gibson lover in the family; he had picked that up from his step-father. On the back the piece of paper said: "A V.I.P. tour for two of the Gibson factory in Memphis Tennessee, all expenses paid." When his step-father read it, he saw Gordon's eyes go round. For a second Tom thought Gordon might actually squeal like Bill often did when excited, but his step-father held it in. He and Gordon had talked about doing the tour one day, but it had always been one of those dream type things. It seemed that when you were on the Gibson website it paid dividends when trying to arrange such things and he knew that V.I.P. would mean extremely V.I.P..
"All you have to do is call the number and book it and it's yours," Bill said, sounding more relaxed by the second. "We'll sort out your flights and accommodation if you tell us when you want to go."
Tom knew that Bill had asked about a tour for four as well and that if they could manage it they would be going along as well, but schedules were so hectic that that was still up in the air.
"It's perfect," Gordon said and Tom believed his step-father completely.
"My turn then," Markus said before the situation could begin to feel awkward.
Bill's eyes were bright with excitement now and Tom was so pleased; Bill had been more than a little worried about the arrangements.
Markus opened his box and laughed.
There was a problem when buying presents for people who had everything they needed; Syb was an old Strigoi and the Strigoi even had specialists to help the members of their society maintain their style of living through the ages. Syb was old money and lots of it and hence, by default, so was Markus. Deciding what to give them had taken Bill the longest; he had been through the agony of Bill choosing as well.
What Markus pulled from his box was a bottle of cognac. It had come up in conversation once that Markus' secret vice was fine cognac and of course Bill had remembered, eventually. The bottle was very fine and very old and Bill had had to ring the people who made it personally to purchase a bottle. It hadn't been the price that had impressed Bill; it had been the recommendations on the connoisseur websites that Tom had managed to find.
"How on earth did you manage to get a bottle of this?" Markus asked, clearly impressed.
"I told them it was the only way I could express my appreciation to a very dear friend," Bill said with a small smile, "and so they sold it to me."
Tom hid his smile; the conversation had been more like an hour long, but that had been the gist of it.
"Thank you," Markus said, for once not irreverent at all, "it will be saved for a very special occasion."
Bill gave a small nod, but Tom could tell his twin was still nervous; the only one left was Syb. Tom was almost positive Bill was holding his breath as Syb opened her little box. When Syb looked into it, her face went completely blank and Tom had absolutely no idea what the female vampire was thinking.
"Bill," Syb said in a very uncharacteristic, quiet voice, "do you understand what this means?"
"Yes," Bill said, voice also very quiet.
Very carefully Syb pulled the pendant that Bill had had specially made from the box, letting in dangle in the light of the candles. This was the gift Bill had fretted the most about, the one Tom had had to make him bring down from the bedroom, because Bill had been so unsure of the contents.
"I spoke to Graham," Bill added and Tom could see the anxiety etched in every muscle of his twin's body.
The pendant was a small dragon, but that wasn't the important part, that was just the design Bill had chosen, what was significant was the silver, glass-lined vial on which the dragon was sitting. It had a rune inscribed on it, a very old rune that had been used by Strigoi for a very long time, a rune that to them meant maker. It was a gift from child to parent in the form Strigoi knew them.
Of course Bill knew that Syb was not the Strigoi who made him, but after a long conversation, Tom was well aware that to his twin Syb was as close as Bill would ever know to the reality. Syb had brought Bill back to life, Tom had seen it happening and he agreed completely with his twin's belief. The idea had come to Bill when, after his twin had been searching around desperately for an idea, Tom had suggested calling Graham, since it was clear Graham and Syb had been friends for a while. Tom had no idea how the subject had come up, since he'd only heard one side of the conversation, but he had seen Bill's eyes light up when it had been suggested.
There had been some abandoning and rekindling of the idea over the last few days, but Tom knew it had been the right thing to do and had managed to make sure Bill didn't become too anxious about it.
Placing the box on one of the small tables, Syb took the pendant in both hands and unclasped the chain, then she very carefully put it round her neck and fastened it again. Tom was pretty sure Bill almost bounced across the room and Syb hugged Bill close and Tom found himself oddly jealous, but then Bill moved back to his side and he realised he was being ridiculous. He looked over to his parents and realised that they seemed confused, so he mouthed that he would explain later.
"Shall we sit down?" he decided to move things on and they piled into the carefully arranged chairs.
He then launched into a conversation he had had playing in his head just for the purpose of keeping things light; right at that moment was not the time for deep and meaningful; Bill's gestures had been more than enough of that. What made him really happy was the fact that Bill was on cloud nine and virtually sitting in his lap; he didn't even mind that he was drinking wine.
It was also nice to see how relaxed Bill was; he hadn't seen Bill that relaxed around other people for quite a while. Bill chatted away animatedly about absolutely nothing for a good half an hour and Tom couldn't help noticing that Bill's hand, which was resting on his thigh, was moving dangerously higher. He was absolutely sure Bill had no idea he was doing it, but Tom was very, very aware.
"How is the bond progressing?" Syb asked in a momentary pause, which was the point where Bill noticed what he was doing and snatched his hand back.
Tom reached out and took his twin's hand to make sure Bill wasn't too mortified even as Bill turned a lovely shade of pink.
"We're figuring it out," Tom said with a smile, hiding the fact that part of him was a little disappointed that Bill had withdrawn the touch.
"Subconscious is in line with conscious," Bill added, with a small embarrassed smile, "mostly."
"Glad to hear it," Syb replied, smiling as well. "It's going to be more difficult for you from now on, so I'm very pleased you're working from a good foundation."
Tom glanced sideways at Bill and was glad to see that the discussion of the subject was not causing Bill to clam up, in fact his twin appeared to be calmly accepting it. Bill was nodding.
"It's not going to be as easy as it has been at home," Bill said, sounding completely rational about it, "but we can only try."
Syb nodded then
"You're both still in the first stages of the bond, so being apart isn't an option at all," Syb told them and Tom had the feeling this was what Syb had expected to talk about that evening; "I would suggest touching quickly and often to reinforce the bond, but still giving the illusion you are returning to how you used to be."
"Bill's always had zero concept of personal space," Tom said and smiled, although he did not wish to detract from the seriousness of the conversation, "especially mine, so we should be able to get away with quite a lot."
Bill rewarded him for that comment by draping over him with a come on smile.
"You mean like this?" Bill asked in a playfully seductive voice.
Tom groaned; Bill was punishing him in a delightful, but nonetheless torturous way.
"Bill," he said, praying for deliverance, "our parents are right over there."
Bill grinned, but didn't look in the least bit remorseful.
"Then be careful how you tease me," was the response that had Tom thinking their relationship was well on the way to returning to it's old balance.
One thing Tom had known since they were old enough to think of themselves as separate people was that, in some things, Bill had him totally outgunned.
"Okay," he said and held up his hands, "you win and now I'm going to find a beer."
Bill squeaked and fell into the space he left as he vacated the chair very rapidly, which caused most of the room to laugh.
"What can I get everyone else?" he asked and hoped Bill wouldn't take revenge before the evening was out.
====
Bill giggled as Tom ran fingers lightly up his sides, tickling him. They had been kissing, but Tom had moved onto his neck and his twin was doing a wonderful job of making his limbs turn to jelly. Ever since the first kiss, Tom had taken to touching him and kissing him at odd times. Tom always asked permission; not always verbally, but in a way they both understood and each time Bill found himself more at ease. His mind was fuller of Tom now and reacted by bringing up those memories rather than the ones he didn't want to recollect.
Most nights they made out before going to sleep, which was what they were doing right then. Since they had started, things had progressed to some seriously heavy, above the waist petting, but that was as far as they had gone. Bill was setting the pace and he sincerely hoped it was not too maddening for Tom. He would have liked to have gone further, but freaking out was a complete passion killer, so slowly was the lesser of two evils.
He was feeling a little braver and decided to take a little control. Being passive was so not his thing and he pushed Tom over onto the bed and attacked Tom's neck the way his twin had been. He didn't need to feed, but, for a split second, he felt like biting anyway, in the end he nibbled instead and the incoherent noise from Tom suggested he was doing well.
He wanted to show Tom that he wasn't afraid, that he could take the lead as well. Tom seemed happy to let him, so he began to explore, using his tongue to taste his twin's bare chest. It was all new and the way Tom was responding to his touches was incredibly arousing. He could feel his own body reacting and it was just about perfect. Of course perfect didn't tend to last forever in his world at the moment.
The gasp that left him as his groin slid against Tom's leg was totally unstoppable, but the shots of electricity that ran through him brought him up short. He felt almost out of control and at that moment that scared him a little. It wasn't that their make-out sessions didn't usually arouse him, it was that this time it was nearly overwhelming. Part of him wanted Tom to touch him there and take this the rest of the way, but most of him wasn't quite ready for that yet. The idea still brought up the dark shadow of hands that had touched him and forced his body to respond when he hadn't wanted it to.
"You okay?" Tom asked, pulling back a little and looking at him.
Bill felt his face slowly heating up. Normally the kissing sessions turned into soft petting that allowed his arousal to slowly fade away and he dealt with any pent up tension by himself in the shower in the morning, but he knew that wasn't going to work this time. Tom seemed completely aware that he wasn't ready to be touched so intimately yet and never pushed it, but he could not help feeling guilty, because Tom had to be ending up in similar states to him. He wanted to be able to give Tom the next level, but he didn't dare.
"I think," he said quietly, eyes dipping out of shame, "I need to go ... go to the bathroom and ..."
It felt like he was abandoning Tom again, like he had done those nights when he woke and couldn't deal with the situation, and he was ashamed of his reaction.
"Bill," Tom said gently, "you don't have to be embarrassed, I understand."
He looked up then, into his twin's face and he saw nothing but understanding there, yet still he felt like he was rejecting Tom and on this night of all nights. This was their last night at home; they would have to be far more careful after this.
"I know you're not ready yet," Tom told him, "and it's okay. I'm amazed at what you do let me do."
"But I don't want this to feel bad," Bill finally found a voice for what bothered him the most, "this shouldn't feel bad. But when you ... it's like he's there as well."
Tom stroked his hair and kissed him on the forehead. They stayed like that for a while, but Bill found himself shifting as his erection made itself known again.
"Is it just the idea of someone else touching you," Tom asked and surprised him, "or the whole thing of there being two of us here while you're that aroused?"
The way Tom chose his language almost made Bill smile; Tom's choice of words was usually cruder than that. Only the awkwardness of the situation stopped him finding it overly amusing.
"Touching," he said quietly and honestly.
It was the memory of hands that he couldn't quite get past yet. What was ridiculous was that in the shower he could imagine it was Tom touching him; that seemed to come naturally, but, when they were together, there was the shadow that would not quite leave.
"Then I have an idea," Tom said, giving him a little smile, "and say no if you don't like it."
Bill was intrigued; for once he had no idea what his twin was thinking.
"Tell me," he encouraged; he so wanted to get past this.
"Don't go to the bathroom," Tom said simply. "Remember when we were younger and we first discovered wanking and we used to do it side by side until that time Mum caught us and told us that we better not do it like that anymore because people might think things that weren't true? We could revive an old tradition."
For a moment, the suggestion shocked him, which was utterly ridiculous and then he felt his face colouring some more. It wasn't that he hadn't been naked in front of Tom; he had been several times since the kidnapping, it was just he had never been naked in front of Tom for sexual reasons. So far their kissing and touching had all been done with at least underwear on.
When he realised that there was an excited little feeling in the pit of his stomach, he knew what his answer was.
"Okay," he said, feeling out of his depth again, but quite enjoying it this time.
Tom smiled at him as if he'd just revealed the secret of life, the universe and everything and then, in a move that surprised him, released him and leant over the side of the bed. His twin returned with a ratty looking box of tissues that was half covered in dust and Bill couldn't help laughing.
"How old is that box?" he asked, using the implications and humour to fight his nerves.
"We haven't been home," Tom said with a grin, "so it's been there a while, but the tissues will be just as good as the day I bought it."
The box was placed on the bed to the side and then Tom gave him a small smile and simply shimmied out of his boxers. Bill couldn't help it; his eyes fixed on Tom's more than ample erection and he felt the funny feeling in his stomach spike and his own groin throbbed. He refused to let his mind dwell too deeply on anything but what he was seeing; thinking too hard tended to not be good some of the time. Part of him definitely liked what he was seeing, so he concentrated on that.
As he watched, Tom wrapped long, clever fingers around his hard cock and groaned low and long, thrusting up once. Bill remembered their early efforts as frantic, unskilled and instant gratification; Tom was quite obviously much more practiced now.
Bill suddenly had a mad urge to reach out and touch as Tom relaxed back onto the bed, but he held himself in check; it definitely wouldn't be fair to indulge when he couldn't let Tom do the same. Instead, he just watched as Tom slowly stroked himself, making small noises of pleasure that had Bill shifting slightly as his own erection begged for attention.
"You can watch if you like," Tom said and Bill realised his twin was looking at him with heavy lidded eyes, "but it'll probably be more fun if you join in."
It felt to Bill as if he had never been as self-conscious as he was at that moment, but this was Tom and Tom was sharing part of himself with him that he suspected very few people had seen. Bill knew there was a difference between the real Tom and the ladies man Tom and he knew he always saw the real one. Feeling awkward, but determined not to leave Tom hanging, he slipped his boxers down and then in a fit of bravado, kicked them off when they reached his feet. Where his underwear landed he had no idea, but he almost took out part of Tom's CD collection which made him giggle a little.
"Save the clever tricks for later," Tom said, sounding amused, but very distracted, "or I'm going to be way ahead of you."
Tom was languidly stroking himself and Bill could feel his twins hungry eyes all over his body and he felt the heat rising in his cheeks again. He wanted desperately to ask Tom to reach out and touch him, but he didn't dare, so he decided to do the next best thing; he tried to put on a little show.
Sex hadn't really been one of his fortes, but he did know how to please himself and he had certain things he liked to do, so he chose to show Tom. Unlike his twin, Bill did not go straight for his insistent cock and instead brushed a finger over one, pink, erect nipple. Tom had given his nipples some attention already, so Bill found himself breathing a little hard as the nipple turned out to be a little more sensitive than he had expected. He brushed it lightly again, feeling the little shots of delight it sent around his body. He felt his cock jump at the stimuli and he let out a little breathy moan even before he properly touched himself.
"Oh god, Bill," Tom's voice was heavy with desire; "do you have any idea what you look like?"
Bill did not reply, just closed his eyes and ran his hand down his chest and over his flat stomach. As his fingers threaded into the coarse blond hair surrounding his cock, he lifted his hips, moaning and thrusting into the fist he made as he did so. For a moment he forgot everything except the wonderful sensation that ran through him. Somehow it felt better than it usually did and he didn't really care why.
Letting his hips lower back to the bed, he released the hold he had on his cock and let his fingers run lower, spreading over his balls as he kept his thumb curled around his erection. It felt so good as he fondled himself gently and he let his legs fall open slightly. As he moved his hand up and down slowly, he lost himself in the sensation and it was only the sounds of an uncontrolled gasp that brought him back to reality.
Opening his eyes, he looked over to Tom and it was all too obvious that Tom's gaze was firmly fixed on him. When they had been younger any exchange between them had been furtive glances, just to see if the other knew something that the one twin didn't; now there was no such inhibition. Tom's eyes flicked up to his face for a moment and they joined gazes. In that instant, Bill felt pure heat in his belly as he saw the lust and love in his twin's eyes. Soon Tom's attention was wandering south again and Bill let his own do the same. Tom was stroking his own erection with firm, deliberate movements and Bill let himself fall into time.
There was no need for words between them and Bill reached out his free hand, taking hold of Tom's arm. Tom swapped hands without barely a hiccup and then Bill found his fingers wound into Tom's between them on the bed. He could sense the sexual energy in his twin and it only added to his own. Tom's presence was like a balm, but exciting at the same time and he let himself be overtaken by the whole experience.
Seconds stretched into what felt like hours as he closed his eyes again, keeping rhythm with Tom by instinct rather than sight. Every sound that came from Tom he found himself mirroring as he climbed higher on the ladder of sexual completion. In the end it was like a tidal wave, completely unstoppable as it broke over him and claimed every part of him for its own. He barely felt liquid shooting onto his hand and stomach as his whole body surrendered and it was all he could do not to yell at the top of his lungs. Only the well trained knowledge that his parents were just down the hall kept his exclamation to a minimum and he was still louder than he should have been.
His muscles dissolved into jelly and he collapsed onto the bed in an immobile heap, breathing hard and enjoying the after shocks that made him shiver in delight. He didn't need to look to know that Tom was in the same state he was; his mind had managed to catalogue Tom's orgasm even as he had succumbed to his own.
"You have great ideas," he said with a little laugh as he finally began to come down properly.
"You have a great way of carrying them out," Tom replied, equally light hearted. "Bill, I think you're the hottest thing I have ever seen."
Bill could cope with lying beside his twin in post orgasm bliss, but compliments he couldn't and he opened his eyes to see Tom staring at him again. His face felt like it was on fire in only a few seconds and he was sure he would spontaneously combust when he found himself letting his eyes run all over Tom as well. Tom looked positively debauched and he could only assume he looked the same.
"Here," Tom said before his embarrassment could spiral out of control and handed him some tissues, "I think we should get some sleep now."
For a split second Bill considered going to the bathroom to clean up properly, but very rapidly decided he couldn't be bothered. Solitary wanking sessions in his room during his early teens that he had had no intention of letting his mother find out about meant that he could very efficiently clean himself up, so he did so. Then he climbed into bed when Tom moved to do the same and snuggled down next to his twin.
He felt relaxed and satisfied in a way that his sessions in the shower had never managed and he had a sneaking suspicion that the bond approved of this small step forward in his and Tom's relationship. When he realised he was assigning sentience to the bond, he mentally smacked himself and found a comfortable spot to lie in.
Hoping that the relaxed feeling would last all night, he wound his hand with Tom's and did his best to sink into the lethargy of post orgasmic bliss.
"Sleep tight," he said as Tom reached out and turned the light off, "I love you."
"Love you too, Billi," Tom replied and kissed his lips ever so lightly, "see you in the morning."
It was probably wishful thinking that he would sleep right through, but it was nice to pretend, so Bill snuggled a little bit closer and let himself relax completely. The next day was going to be a very big one.
====
Bill looked around the room at the cases and took a deep breath. Everything was packed and there were only a little over an hour of complete safety left. The outside world had never used to frighten him, but parts of it did now and he still had to work that out. This was the first step to that and it felt so huge from this side of it. He was used to the warmth and safety of home and leaving it was not easy.
"Everything ready?" Tom asked, walking in with the bags from the bathroom.
"Everything but me," Bill said, feeling suddenly very small in a big, big world.
Tom put the bags down straight away and walked towards him, pulling him into a warm hug.
"The world might not be ready for you," Tom told him firmly, "but you are ready for the world."
The doubt and anxiety, that had been trying to overwhelm him, dimmed a little and he held to Tom for a little while. Nothing was remotely as large when Tom was there and he let himself breathe in the scent of his twin and used Tom's presence to calm himself. They were both tired; the night had not been restful even after their indulgence, but together they would always be strong.
Eventually he pulled back and gave Tom a small smile.
"Thank you," he said, "now I am."
End of Chapter 10
On to Next Chapter
And I forgot to add ... definitely more than boy kissing in this one.
Title: Out With the Old, In With the New 10/20
Author: Beren
Fandom: Tokio Hotel RPS
Pairing(s): Bill/Tom, Bill/OMC (reported, non-con)
Rating: NC17/18
Warnings: rape (non-graphic), twincest, vampires
Summary: There are things that many people do not see and are never supposed to see, but when one of these takes Bill from his hotel room, by force, everything changes for him and Tom.
Links:
Prologue | Ch 01 | Ch 02 | Ch 03 | Ch 04
| Ch 05 | Ch 06 | Ch 07 | Ch 08 | Ch 09
| Ch 10 | Ch 11 | Ch 12 | Ch 13 | Ch 14
| Ch 15 | Ch 16 | Ch 17 | Ch 18 | Ch 19 | Ch 20
Full Chapter Listing (with chapter descriptions)
Chapter 10 Getting Ready
The next day they were off to the apartment and they had spent most of the day packing and making sure everything was ready. Tom could tell that Bill was incredibly nervous about the whole thing, but was putting a brave face on it. Leaving the comfort and safety of home was a big step and he wouldn't have let it happen if he hadn't thought Bill could cope.
One of the consequences of the move was that that evening it was the last night visit from Syb. In the apartment with the other guys it would be impossible to have the long, often intimate chats with Bill's mentor and sometimes Markus. Bill was in no way ready to let go of Syb's guidance yet, but any meetings were going to have to be arranged more formally from now on. They wouldn't be able to act so casually around each other either. Tom knew it was going to be difficult not being able to just reach out and touch Bill anyway he wanted at anytime.
Tom had already had a quiet word with Georg and Gustav to explain that he and Bill would probably disappear into one of their rooms at odd times. He had told his friends it was because Bill sometimes needed personal space without anyone else but him around and they had been very understanding of the whole idea. Once a bedroom door was shut, he was confident that it would be sacrosanct, but they couldn't hide out the whole time.
"Syb's here," Bill said as they arranged the living room ready for the meeting.
Bill was becoming extremely proficient with the enhanced senses gig and Tom was very glad of this, because it had saved them a couple of times. Even though their mother and step father accepted their new relationship, being caught snogging would have been mortifying.
"I'll get the door, you get the drinks and let Mum and Gordon know that our guests have arrived," Tom said and headed in the right direction.
Syb had been giving Bill and him lots of information about Strigoi society and the traditions and niceties of it. This being the last chance they had to see Syb and Marcus at home, Bill had decided, as Bill was want to do, that this should be a special occasion. It turned out that the whole wine and blood thing was a tradition at more than just formal gatherings and, between close friends, the blood was often the host's. Tom didn't think Bill was overly fond of red wine, but Bill was embracing the tradition and had even begged Gordon to find some wine glasses with gold stems and some others with silver stems. Everything was set up in the kitchen and although Tom had put his foot down at drinking wine, he was happy to see Bill partially back on form.
Their mother had been most surprised when they had invited her and Gordon to the gathering; usually their parents made themselves scarce when Syb was coming round, to give them some privacy. It wasn't a huge house so most often their parents went out on those evenings.
"Come in," Tom greeted brightly as he opened the door.
Syb smiled at him, since she had not yet knocked.
"Not you too," Markus complained in a good natured tone. "We, as the humans, have to help them," Markus nodded in Syb's direction, "to maintain the illusion of not being omnipotent; otherwise it goes to their heads."
Tom laughed and moved out of the way, so their guests could enter the house.
"Blame Bill," he said as he took Syb and Markus' coats, "and blame Bill for this evening as well; he wanted to make it special."
After hanging up the coats on two available hooks, he led his friends into the living room and watched Syb take in the area. The whole place was lit by candles, far gentler on vampire eyes than any electric light and there were little bowls of nibbles on various small tables around the room. Bill appeared seconds later carrying a tray and looking kind of nervous, but to Tom's delight Syb saw the wine glasses on the tray and absolutely beamed. It wasn't very often that Syb seemed to let such an all encompassing expression onto her face, so Tom was positive the female Strigoi was incredibly pleased.
Obviously encouraged, Bill walked over to their guests with the tray and offered first Syb and then Markus a glass.
"This is a wonderful surprise," Syb said, taking a sip from her glass.
For a split second Syb looked rather startled and Tom was sure he saw the woman's eyes flash just for a moment.
"Are you okay?" Bill asked, clearly having seen the same thing and putting the try down. "Did I do it wrong?"
Tom could feel the evening going downhill rapidly before it had really begun, but Syb reached out quickly and patted Bill gently on the hand.
"You did it perfectly," Syb said with a smile and visibly recovering, "it's just your blood is distinctly potent."
"What Syb means is that she has no head for the strong stuff," Markus added with a laugh, at which Syb just rolled her eyes.
It was then that Tom saw his mother and step father arrive and he casually walked over to where Bill had put down the drinks and handed them out. He took a glass himself to keep Bill happy, but he had an eye on the exit to the kitchen where he had some cold beer in the fridge. Then he stepped up close to Bill, because he knew his twin was not quite finished.
"I just wanted to say thank you," Bill said, uncharacteristically bashful. "It's been a difficult time these last few weeks and I know I wouldn't be standing here ready to step back into the world without all of you. I know it's not over and there's still a long way to go, but I wanted to say thank you now, before it gets crazy."
Putting his glass down Bill bent down behind the table and produced a few little boxes. The agonising that had gone into deciding what was in each had been, in Tom's opinion, way over the top, but when Bill did something it was never done by halves.
"They're not much, but I hope you like them," Bill said, and quickly handed a box to Syb, then Markus and then each of their parents.
What surprised Tom was when he was handed one as well. He had helped Bill plan and order everything, paying extortionate prices so that everything was ready on time, but he had not helped Bill buy something for him. How Bill had managed to do so without him knowing was beyond him; they had hardly ever been apart.
"Mum helped," Bill said with a sheepish smile.
Tom found himself grinning happily. They rarely bought each other presents. They bought each other things all the time, like if he saw something in a shop he just knew Bill would love and if Bill had known about it wouldn't have been able to live without, he'd pick it up and vice versa, but actual, wrapped gifts were rare and hence very special.
Opening his box, he couldn't help laughing in delight; it was a hat, not a cap, but one of the bands he wore under his caps to keep his dreads back. It was black, just like his others, but he knew Bill and he knew that wouldn't be it so he pulled it out of the box. Sure enough, on the inside there was some embroidery and it said: "All my love, Bill".
"Thank you," was all he said and pulled Bill towards him, giving his twin a quick kiss on the lips.
Bill was smiling when they pulled apart, but still looked nervous.
"Oh, Bill," Tom heard their mother say and he turned to see her holding the two tickets he had helped Bill put in a box earlier.
Their mother loved the theatre, but because of the crazy lives they all had and where they lived, she very rarely had a chance to go. Bill had found her favourite play, bought the best tickets in the house and arranged hotel accommodation and transport to go with it.
"You always say it's your favourite," Bill said, smiling a bit more, "I hope it's a good company."
"Sweetheart," their mum said, looking just this side of weepy, "they could be the local players and it would still be wonderful."
It seemed as if everyone was taking turns, because Gordon opened his next. They had been buying people expensive presents since they had had the money to do it, they liked to make their friends and family happy, so it had been very difficult for Bill to decide what to buy their parents. Tom had had a lot to do with this one and he was very proud of Bill for thinking of it. Their stepfather was frowning as he pulled a piece of paper out of the box and Tom knew all it said on the top was Gibson.
He was not the only Gibson lover in the family; he had picked that up from his step-father. On the back the piece of paper said: "A V.I.P. tour for two of the Gibson factory in Memphis Tennessee, all expenses paid." When his step-father read it, he saw Gordon's eyes go round. For a second Tom thought Gordon might actually squeal like Bill often did when excited, but his step-father held it in. He and Gordon had talked about doing the tour one day, but it had always been one of those dream type things. It seemed that when you were on the Gibson website it paid dividends when trying to arrange such things and he knew that V.I.P. would mean extremely V.I.P..
"All you have to do is call the number and book it and it's yours," Bill said, sounding more relaxed by the second. "We'll sort out your flights and accommodation if you tell us when you want to go."
Tom knew that Bill had asked about a tour for four as well and that if they could manage it they would be going along as well, but schedules were so hectic that that was still up in the air.
"It's perfect," Gordon said and Tom believed his step-father completely.
"My turn then," Markus said before the situation could begin to feel awkward.
Bill's eyes were bright with excitement now and Tom was so pleased; Bill had been more than a little worried about the arrangements.
Markus opened his box and laughed.
There was a problem when buying presents for people who had everything they needed; Syb was an old Strigoi and the Strigoi even had specialists to help the members of their society maintain their style of living through the ages. Syb was old money and lots of it and hence, by default, so was Markus. Deciding what to give them had taken Bill the longest; he had been through the agony of Bill choosing as well.
What Markus pulled from his box was a bottle of cognac. It had come up in conversation once that Markus' secret vice was fine cognac and of course Bill had remembered, eventually. The bottle was very fine and very old and Bill had had to ring the people who made it personally to purchase a bottle. It hadn't been the price that had impressed Bill; it had been the recommendations on the connoisseur websites that Tom had managed to find.
"How on earth did you manage to get a bottle of this?" Markus asked, clearly impressed.
"I told them it was the only way I could express my appreciation to a very dear friend," Bill said with a small smile, "and so they sold it to me."
Tom hid his smile; the conversation had been more like an hour long, but that had been the gist of it.
"Thank you," Markus said, for once not irreverent at all, "it will be saved for a very special occasion."
Bill gave a small nod, but Tom could tell his twin was still nervous; the only one left was Syb. Tom was almost positive Bill was holding his breath as Syb opened her little box. When Syb looked into it, her face went completely blank and Tom had absolutely no idea what the female vampire was thinking.
"Bill," Syb said in a very uncharacteristic, quiet voice, "do you understand what this means?"
"Yes," Bill said, voice also very quiet.
Very carefully Syb pulled the pendant that Bill had had specially made from the box, letting in dangle in the light of the candles. This was the gift Bill had fretted the most about, the one Tom had had to make him bring down from the bedroom, because Bill had been so unsure of the contents.
"I spoke to Graham," Bill added and Tom could see the anxiety etched in every muscle of his twin's body.
The pendant was a small dragon, but that wasn't the important part, that was just the design Bill had chosen, what was significant was the silver, glass-lined vial on which the dragon was sitting. It had a rune inscribed on it, a very old rune that had been used by Strigoi for a very long time, a rune that to them meant maker. It was a gift from child to parent in the form Strigoi knew them.
Of course Bill knew that Syb was not the Strigoi who made him, but after a long conversation, Tom was well aware that to his twin Syb was as close as Bill would ever know to the reality. Syb had brought Bill back to life, Tom had seen it happening and he agreed completely with his twin's belief. The idea had come to Bill when, after his twin had been searching around desperately for an idea, Tom had suggested calling Graham, since it was clear Graham and Syb had been friends for a while. Tom had no idea how the subject had come up, since he'd only heard one side of the conversation, but he had seen Bill's eyes light up when it had been suggested.
There had been some abandoning and rekindling of the idea over the last few days, but Tom knew it had been the right thing to do and had managed to make sure Bill didn't become too anxious about it.
Placing the box on one of the small tables, Syb took the pendant in both hands and unclasped the chain, then she very carefully put it round her neck and fastened it again. Tom was pretty sure Bill almost bounced across the room and Syb hugged Bill close and Tom found himself oddly jealous, but then Bill moved back to his side and he realised he was being ridiculous. He looked over to his parents and realised that they seemed confused, so he mouthed that he would explain later.
"Shall we sit down?" he decided to move things on and they piled into the carefully arranged chairs.
He then launched into a conversation he had had playing in his head just for the purpose of keeping things light; right at that moment was not the time for deep and meaningful; Bill's gestures had been more than enough of that. What made him really happy was the fact that Bill was on cloud nine and virtually sitting in his lap; he didn't even mind that he was drinking wine.
It was also nice to see how relaxed Bill was; he hadn't seen Bill that relaxed around other people for quite a while. Bill chatted away animatedly about absolutely nothing for a good half an hour and Tom couldn't help noticing that Bill's hand, which was resting on his thigh, was moving dangerously higher. He was absolutely sure Bill had no idea he was doing it, but Tom was very, very aware.
"How is the bond progressing?" Syb asked in a momentary pause, which was the point where Bill noticed what he was doing and snatched his hand back.
Tom reached out and took his twin's hand to make sure Bill wasn't too mortified even as Bill turned a lovely shade of pink.
"We're figuring it out," Tom said with a smile, hiding the fact that part of him was a little disappointed that Bill had withdrawn the touch.
"Subconscious is in line with conscious," Bill added, with a small embarrassed smile, "mostly."
"Glad to hear it," Syb replied, smiling as well. "It's going to be more difficult for you from now on, so I'm very pleased you're working from a good foundation."
Tom glanced sideways at Bill and was glad to see that the discussion of the subject was not causing Bill to clam up, in fact his twin appeared to be calmly accepting it. Bill was nodding.
"It's not going to be as easy as it has been at home," Bill said, sounding completely rational about it, "but we can only try."
Syb nodded then
"You're both still in the first stages of the bond, so being apart isn't an option at all," Syb told them and Tom had the feeling this was what Syb had expected to talk about that evening; "I would suggest touching quickly and often to reinforce the bond, but still giving the illusion you are returning to how you used to be."
"Bill's always had zero concept of personal space," Tom said and smiled, although he did not wish to detract from the seriousness of the conversation, "especially mine, so we should be able to get away with quite a lot."
Bill rewarded him for that comment by draping over him with a come on smile.
"You mean like this?" Bill asked in a playfully seductive voice.
Tom groaned; Bill was punishing him in a delightful, but nonetheless torturous way.
"Bill," he said, praying for deliverance, "our parents are right over there."
Bill grinned, but didn't look in the least bit remorseful.
"Then be careful how you tease me," was the response that had Tom thinking their relationship was well on the way to returning to it's old balance.
One thing Tom had known since they were old enough to think of themselves as separate people was that, in some things, Bill had him totally outgunned.
"Okay," he said and held up his hands, "you win and now I'm going to find a beer."
Bill squeaked and fell into the space he left as he vacated the chair very rapidly, which caused most of the room to laugh.
"What can I get everyone else?" he asked and hoped Bill wouldn't take revenge before the evening was out.
====
Bill giggled as Tom ran fingers lightly up his sides, tickling him. They had been kissing, but Tom had moved onto his neck and his twin was doing a wonderful job of making his limbs turn to jelly. Ever since the first kiss, Tom had taken to touching him and kissing him at odd times. Tom always asked permission; not always verbally, but in a way they both understood and each time Bill found himself more at ease. His mind was fuller of Tom now and reacted by bringing up those memories rather than the ones he didn't want to recollect.
Most nights they made out before going to sleep, which was what they were doing right then. Since they had started, things had progressed to some seriously heavy, above the waist petting, but that was as far as they had gone. Bill was setting the pace and he sincerely hoped it was not too maddening for Tom. He would have liked to have gone further, but freaking out was a complete passion killer, so slowly was the lesser of two evils.
He was feeling a little braver and decided to take a little control. Being passive was so not his thing and he pushed Tom over onto the bed and attacked Tom's neck the way his twin had been. He didn't need to feed, but, for a split second, he felt like biting anyway, in the end he nibbled instead and the incoherent noise from Tom suggested he was doing well.
He wanted to show Tom that he wasn't afraid, that he could take the lead as well. Tom seemed happy to let him, so he began to explore, using his tongue to taste his twin's bare chest. It was all new and the way Tom was responding to his touches was incredibly arousing. He could feel his own body reacting and it was just about perfect. Of course perfect didn't tend to last forever in his world at the moment.
The gasp that left him as his groin slid against Tom's leg was totally unstoppable, but the shots of electricity that ran through him brought him up short. He felt almost out of control and at that moment that scared him a little. It wasn't that their make-out sessions didn't usually arouse him, it was that this time it was nearly overwhelming. Part of him wanted Tom to touch him there and take this the rest of the way, but most of him wasn't quite ready for that yet. The idea still brought up the dark shadow of hands that had touched him and forced his body to respond when he hadn't wanted it to.
"You okay?" Tom asked, pulling back a little and looking at him.
Bill felt his face slowly heating up. Normally the kissing sessions turned into soft petting that allowed his arousal to slowly fade away and he dealt with any pent up tension by himself in the shower in the morning, but he knew that wasn't going to work this time. Tom seemed completely aware that he wasn't ready to be touched so intimately yet and never pushed it, but he could not help feeling guilty, because Tom had to be ending up in similar states to him. He wanted to be able to give Tom the next level, but he didn't dare.
"I think," he said quietly, eyes dipping out of shame, "I need to go ... go to the bathroom and ..."
It felt like he was abandoning Tom again, like he had done those nights when he woke and couldn't deal with the situation, and he was ashamed of his reaction.
"Bill," Tom said gently, "you don't have to be embarrassed, I understand."
He looked up then, into his twin's face and he saw nothing but understanding there, yet still he felt like he was rejecting Tom and on this night of all nights. This was their last night at home; they would have to be far more careful after this.
"I know you're not ready yet," Tom told him, "and it's okay. I'm amazed at what you do let me do."
"But I don't want this to feel bad," Bill finally found a voice for what bothered him the most, "this shouldn't feel bad. But when you ... it's like he's there as well."
Tom stroked his hair and kissed him on the forehead. They stayed like that for a while, but Bill found himself shifting as his erection made itself known again.
"Is it just the idea of someone else touching you," Tom asked and surprised him, "or the whole thing of there being two of us here while you're that aroused?"
The way Tom chose his language almost made Bill smile; Tom's choice of words was usually cruder than that. Only the awkwardness of the situation stopped him finding it overly amusing.
"Touching," he said quietly and honestly.
It was the memory of hands that he couldn't quite get past yet. What was ridiculous was that in the shower he could imagine it was Tom touching him; that seemed to come naturally, but, when they were together, there was the shadow that would not quite leave.
"Then I have an idea," Tom said, giving him a little smile, "and say no if you don't like it."
Bill was intrigued; for once he had no idea what his twin was thinking.
"Tell me," he encouraged; he so wanted to get past this.
"Don't go to the bathroom," Tom said simply. "Remember when we were younger and we first discovered wanking and we used to do it side by side until that time Mum caught us and told us that we better not do it like that anymore because people might think things that weren't true? We could revive an old tradition."
For a moment, the suggestion shocked him, which was utterly ridiculous and then he felt his face colouring some more. It wasn't that he hadn't been naked in front of Tom; he had been several times since the kidnapping, it was just he had never been naked in front of Tom for sexual reasons. So far their kissing and touching had all been done with at least underwear on.
When he realised that there was an excited little feeling in the pit of his stomach, he knew what his answer was.
"Okay," he said, feeling out of his depth again, but quite enjoying it this time.
Tom smiled at him as if he'd just revealed the secret of life, the universe and everything and then, in a move that surprised him, released him and leant over the side of the bed. His twin returned with a ratty looking box of tissues that was half covered in dust and Bill couldn't help laughing.
"How old is that box?" he asked, using the implications and humour to fight his nerves.
"We haven't been home," Tom said with a grin, "so it's been there a while, but the tissues will be just as good as the day I bought it."
The box was placed on the bed to the side and then Tom gave him a small smile and simply shimmied out of his boxers. Bill couldn't help it; his eyes fixed on Tom's more than ample erection and he felt the funny feeling in his stomach spike and his own groin throbbed. He refused to let his mind dwell too deeply on anything but what he was seeing; thinking too hard tended to not be good some of the time. Part of him definitely liked what he was seeing, so he concentrated on that.
As he watched, Tom wrapped long, clever fingers around his hard cock and groaned low and long, thrusting up once. Bill remembered their early efforts as frantic, unskilled and instant gratification; Tom was quite obviously much more practiced now.
Bill suddenly had a mad urge to reach out and touch as Tom relaxed back onto the bed, but he held himself in check; it definitely wouldn't be fair to indulge when he couldn't let Tom do the same. Instead, he just watched as Tom slowly stroked himself, making small noises of pleasure that had Bill shifting slightly as his own erection begged for attention.
"You can watch if you like," Tom said and Bill realised his twin was looking at him with heavy lidded eyes, "but it'll probably be more fun if you join in."
It felt to Bill as if he had never been as self-conscious as he was at that moment, but this was Tom and Tom was sharing part of himself with him that he suspected very few people had seen. Bill knew there was a difference between the real Tom and the ladies man Tom and he knew he always saw the real one. Feeling awkward, but determined not to leave Tom hanging, he slipped his boxers down and then in a fit of bravado, kicked them off when they reached his feet. Where his underwear landed he had no idea, but he almost took out part of Tom's CD collection which made him giggle a little.
"Save the clever tricks for later," Tom said, sounding amused, but very distracted, "or I'm going to be way ahead of you."
Tom was languidly stroking himself and Bill could feel his twins hungry eyes all over his body and he felt the heat rising in his cheeks again. He wanted desperately to ask Tom to reach out and touch him, but he didn't dare, so he decided to do the next best thing; he tried to put on a little show.
Sex hadn't really been one of his fortes, but he did know how to please himself and he had certain things he liked to do, so he chose to show Tom. Unlike his twin, Bill did not go straight for his insistent cock and instead brushed a finger over one, pink, erect nipple. Tom had given his nipples some attention already, so Bill found himself breathing a little hard as the nipple turned out to be a little more sensitive than he had expected. He brushed it lightly again, feeling the little shots of delight it sent around his body. He felt his cock jump at the stimuli and he let out a little breathy moan even before he properly touched himself.
"Oh god, Bill," Tom's voice was heavy with desire; "do you have any idea what you look like?"
Bill did not reply, just closed his eyes and ran his hand down his chest and over his flat stomach. As his fingers threaded into the coarse blond hair surrounding his cock, he lifted his hips, moaning and thrusting into the fist he made as he did so. For a moment he forgot everything except the wonderful sensation that ran through him. Somehow it felt better than it usually did and he didn't really care why.
Letting his hips lower back to the bed, he released the hold he had on his cock and let his fingers run lower, spreading over his balls as he kept his thumb curled around his erection. It felt so good as he fondled himself gently and he let his legs fall open slightly. As he moved his hand up and down slowly, he lost himself in the sensation and it was only the sounds of an uncontrolled gasp that brought him back to reality.
Opening his eyes, he looked over to Tom and it was all too obvious that Tom's gaze was firmly fixed on him. When they had been younger any exchange between them had been furtive glances, just to see if the other knew something that the one twin didn't; now there was no such inhibition. Tom's eyes flicked up to his face for a moment and they joined gazes. In that instant, Bill felt pure heat in his belly as he saw the lust and love in his twin's eyes. Soon Tom's attention was wandering south again and Bill let his own do the same. Tom was stroking his own erection with firm, deliberate movements and Bill let himself fall into time.
There was no need for words between them and Bill reached out his free hand, taking hold of Tom's arm. Tom swapped hands without barely a hiccup and then Bill found his fingers wound into Tom's between them on the bed. He could sense the sexual energy in his twin and it only added to his own. Tom's presence was like a balm, but exciting at the same time and he let himself be overtaken by the whole experience.
Seconds stretched into what felt like hours as he closed his eyes again, keeping rhythm with Tom by instinct rather than sight. Every sound that came from Tom he found himself mirroring as he climbed higher on the ladder of sexual completion. In the end it was like a tidal wave, completely unstoppable as it broke over him and claimed every part of him for its own. He barely felt liquid shooting onto his hand and stomach as his whole body surrendered and it was all he could do not to yell at the top of his lungs. Only the well trained knowledge that his parents were just down the hall kept his exclamation to a minimum and he was still louder than he should have been.
His muscles dissolved into jelly and he collapsed onto the bed in an immobile heap, breathing hard and enjoying the after shocks that made him shiver in delight. He didn't need to look to know that Tom was in the same state he was; his mind had managed to catalogue Tom's orgasm even as he had succumbed to his own.
"You have great ideas," he said with a little laugh as he finally began to come down properly.
"You have a great way of carrying them out," Tom replied, equally light hearted. "Bill, I think you're the hottest thing I have ever seen."
Bill could cope with lying beside his twin in post orgasm bliss, but compliments he couldn't and he opened his eyes to see Tom staring at him again. His face felt like it was on fire in only a few seconds and he was sure he would spontaneously combust when he found himself letting his eyes run all over Tom as well. Tom looked positively debauched and he could only assume he looked the same.
"Here," Tom said before his embarrassment could spiral out of control and handed him some tissues, "I think we should get some sleep now."
For a split second Bill considered going to the bathroom to clean up properly, but very rapidly decided he couldn't be bothered. Solitary wanking sessions in his room during his early teens that he had had no intention of letting his mother find out about meant that he could very efficiently clean himself up, so he did so. Then he climbed into bed when Tom moved to do the same and snuggled down next to his twin.
He felt relaxed and satisfied in a way that his sessions in the shower had never managed and he had a sneaking suspicion that the bond approved of this small step forward in his and Tom's relationship. When he realised he was assigning sentience to the bond, he mentally smacked himself and found a comfortable spot to lie in.
Hoping that the relaxed feeling would last all night, he wound his hand with Tom's and did his best to sink into the lethargy of post orgasmic bliss.
"Sleep tight," he said as Tom reached out and turned the light off, "I love you."
"Love you too, Billi," Tom replied and kissed his lips ever so lightly, "see you in the morning."
It was probably wishful thinking that he would sleep right through, but it was nice to pretend, so Bill snuggled a little bit closer and let himself relax completely. The next day was going to be a very big one.
====
Bill looked around the room at the cases and took a deep breath. Everything was packed and there were only a little over an hour of complete safety left. The outside world had never used to frighten him, but parts of it did now and he still had to work that out. This was the first step to that and it felt so huge from this side of it. He was used to the warmth and safety of home and leaving it was not easy.
"Everything ready?" Tom asked, walking in with the bags from the bathroom.
"Everything but me," Bill said, feeling suddenly very small in a big, big world.
Tom put the bags down straight away and walked towards him, pulling him into a warm hug.
"The world might not be ready for you," Tom told him firmly, "but you are ready for the world."
The doubt and anxiety, that had been trying to overwhelm him, dimmed a little and he held to Tom for a little while. Nothing was remotely as large when Tom was there and he let himself breathe in the scent of his twin and used Tom's presence to calm himself. They were both tired; the night had not been restful even after their indulgence, but together they would always be strong.
Eventually he pulled back and gave Tom a small smile.
"Thank you," he said, "now I am."
End of Chapter 10
On to Next Chapter
